A Man and His GPS

As wives, we like to think that our husbands are invincible...let's face it, they want to think the same thing!! I have to admit being on this trip with Tony has been very entertaining. Tony bought a Magellin GPS and named it Wilma...a tip of the hat to our new life in Wilmington...but, Tony and Wilma have not been getting along. Wilma tells Tony how to drive... He's not crazy about that. "Turn left in .5 miles to highway...." Tony, being Tony says...."what are you talking about? Turn left...that will take me right back to where I started." And, being Tony, he will either turn right or go straight....which, as you can imagine, annoys Wilma a great deal. She will tell him to make a "legal" U turn or will adjust her route...but Tony just doesn't trust Wilma...he goes the way he wants to go. Now, there are times when he ends up in a construction zone and has to backtrack....which drives him nuts...but, there are also times when Wilma will take us down I64 West and then tell us to turn onto US Route 122, only to take us back to I 64 West 5 minutes later.....so, go figure. But, it is comical to watch. Tony finally let me drive in Virginia. I turned Wilma off and drove down I 64 to where we needed to turn off. Wilma and I are fine...Wilma and Tony fight like cats and dogs. She is a silent preditor...laughing when she takes him down long, winding roads and ignoring him when he yells..."what do you mean get off the highway....we need to stay on the highway!!" I think that Wilma should be programmed to say things like, "I heard that, asshole." Or, "hey, I got you here, what's your problem????" Or "why did you buy me if you knew where you were going?" Anything that will zap Tony. Tony drives with 6 maps, me and a GPS. We get where we're going everytime...is it Tony? Is it the maps? Is it Wilma> I know it's not me...I just go along for the ride and enjoy the exchange between Tony and Wilma...all we need now is a female engine that gives him the raspberries as he tries to pass someone one...or who complains about cramps when he's putting gas in the tank! Now that would be a hoot!!