Words

I love words.  I can't remember a time when I wasn't reading, although I know there must have been a point in my young life when words meant nothing to me.  I have taken a million speech classes and look at how words are pronounced just a bit differently than other people.  I was taught that the "Ohio drawl," was not pleasing to the ears and tended to sound "lazy" when it came to pronunciation.    So now, I don't say, "worsh"  I say, "wash" with an emphasis on the "WAH" sound.   

In my "medical" career, I am learning many new words.  I'm also finding out that just because it's a big medical word, doesn't mean it's a terrible illness.  For example:

 

"Syncope" (pronounced Sin-co-pee) is a fainting spell, or just passing out.

 

"Pyelonephritis"  is when a urinary tract infection progresses to your kidneys.

 

"Sinus Tachycardia" is a fast heart beat or a rapid contraction in a normal heart.

 

"Matatarsophalangeal Joint Sprain" is when you bend your big toe back and injure it.

 

When you look at it that way, medical words aren't so scary.  But, now take a look at words of the south.   Initially, I thought they were scary.  Scary sounding, anyway.

 

Many southern people wear old cigarette smoke like the French wear perfume.  It hangs on them.  It "waaffs" to others, even when it is not wanted.  It smells like second hand smoke, once removed.  You know it can't hurt you, but oh boy, you know it's there.  Southern people have their own language and like the cigarette smell, you know it's there.  It offends some and encompasses others.   Here's what I have learned so far:

 

Southern Definitions:

 

Carry:   to drive or transport someone from one place to another.

 

Tote:   to carry, either packages or small children.

 

Girl:   women of all ages.

 

Wad:  wide, as in a double wide trailer or manufactured home.

 

High Cotton:  wealthy, or at least, not on government assistance.

 

Fell From Ugly:    a person who is not attractive.

 

How Do:   means How Do You Do?

 

Lick:   means none or nothing.

 

Ant:   means Ain't.  You need to put the emphasis on the "a" but make it sound like a hard "a" and then throw away the rest of the word.

 

Cuz,:  means because, but the emphasis is on the "c."  It's a guttural sound.  It makes your mouth pucker and your neck snap.   If that doesn't happen, you aren't saying it the southern way.

 

Suwanne:   means I swear.

 

Pert Near:   means close.

 

Cheer:   means here.

 

Caint:   means can't.

 

Gace or Gayce:   means gas.

 

Dungarees:   means work clothes, most often blue jeans or denim.

 

Air:   means are.

 

Bay:   means the letter "B."

 

Pay:   means the letter "P."

 

Tud-ay:  means today.

 

Yaint:   means you aren't.

 

Yezum:   means yes, ma'am.

 

Truck:   means any vehicle larger than a Volkswagen, full of rust. 

 

Croker:   means doctor.

 

So, let's say a friend with a better job called you up and wanted to go shopping with you, but because her car was being repaired, she asked you to drive.  She's not your best looking friend, but she's OK.   The conversation would be:

 

"That high cotton girl called me up to carry her all over town and tote her stuff.  I caint do that, cuz I ant been to the bay pay to get gayce.  Hell, she fell from ugly anyway, why she bothern me?"

Make no mistake, this is not, "black talk," as many people might  think.  But it is conversation that happens every day in the south; black or white. 

 

Maybe you aren't motivated on any given day.  If that was the case, you would say,

 

"I ant done a lick tud-ay."

 

Or, perhaps you meet someone who has an accent.  If that were the case, you would say,

 

"You ant from cheer, air ya...You a Yankee?"

 

I have heard many interesting things in my medical experience.   To be honest, there is much that I don't understand.  But, when that is the case, I have found warm and wonderful people eager to "educate" me to some extent on what they are saying and how I can use the phrases--even the medical ones because they know what is going on with their bodies. 

 

I registered a man today at 4:59.  Patient Registration was supposed to close at 5:00.  As I was walking toward the doors to lock them, he was walking in.  He didn't have a procedural order and hadn't been at a our facility before...so, a potential 5 minute registration turned into a 20 minute experience.  He smelled to high heaven of cigarettes.  But, when he found out I was about to close (he thought I was leaving for the day...I didn't tell him I was there until 11:30 p.m.)  He said to me:

 

"Dang (damn,) you musta wanted to keel me when I walked in the dough.  I dint know you waz closing or I wudda come suuner.  Sorry to hold ya up from yo family." 

He was having a serious test on a serious part of his body.  I sensed he was afraid.  I was sorry because I have seen that test before and know it's not usually good news. 

"No problem," I said, "I ant done a lick tud-ay."   Never in a million years did I think I would say something like that. 

I may still say, "wash" instead of "worsh," but when I am with my patients who have serious things going on, I am a southerner.  I will do my best to be on their side and practice my southern accent with vigor.  I will practice saying, "pie" making sure my jaw hits my chin and making it sound like "hi" with a very silent "p--like, pa-i"  It's the least I can do now that I'm living in the land of Dixie....in more ways than one.   Like Kevin Costner in "Dances With Wolves," I am adapting to my environment.  Hopefully, I will make a difference.

 

Words--there is a song that Cher sings that says, "Words are like weapons, they wound sometimes."  And she is right.  But, if we can use words, no matter how they sound to us initially, to  find commonality, isn't that a good thing? 

 

"Wheeze goin to the movies, t'morrow so I kin relax."  I hope y'all have a good day, too.