I'll Miss You, Jamie

Sometimes it's surprising who touches your life.  It could be a doctor, a friend, a relative or someone that you only see once in a while. 

That's what happened to me.  A while ago, I started therapy for a number of reasons.  Some of the sessions were really hard.  You explore your life, your rationale, your choices, your failures and you take a hard look at yourself.  Sometimes, you don't like what you see. 

After one of these sessions, I was hungry.  I decided to stop at a local restaurant before going home.  Instead of opting for a table, I decided to just sit at the bar and grab a sandwich.  

I was lost in my thoughts, not really looking at the menu, not really aware of where I was.  My mind was still at the session, going over words and events.  A young lady behind the bar came up to me and said, "girl, you look like you have trouble, what's going on?"  I told her that  I was fine.  She kind of made a noise and said something to the effect of, "if you're fine, you wouldn't be sitting at a bar looking the way you look.  What's up?"  After a while, I finally told her that I had just come from therapy and was struggling with stuff in general.  

And that was the start of a nice, but unusual friendship.  For awhile, I went to see Jamie regularly.  We would talk about the session and she would take out the therapy-speak and talk honestly about the paths people take and why.   I wondered if I should be paying her instead of the therapist.  

We shared many things.  I found out that she was in an abusive relationship and that working at the restaurant was not her ultimate career choice, but it paid the bills her husband did not.  

I watched her as she interacted with customers.  She was amazing.  She remembered drink choices, favorite foods, birthdays, recent illnesses and names of children and grandchildren.  She made everyone feel special.  And, at the end of every visit, she would say, "take care of yourself and be careful out there."  

Skeptics would say that she does all of this for tips, but I don't think so.  Maybe she was in tune with people because of the relationship she was in.  Maybe it's just in her nature to be aware of others.  Whatever it was, people left smiling.  

I stopped in today for lunch and she was there.  She approached me and said, "I have to tell you something."  The last time she said that to me, she told me she left her abusive partner, so I was at a loss for what was coming next. 

"I'm leaving here," she said.  "I got a great job offer."  It turns out that people who sat at the bar on a regular basis saw her customer service skills and offered her a job dealing with their clients.  She won't have to work weekends or odd shifts.  Plus, the money she will make is much better than restaurant pay and tips. 

I was sad, but thrilled.  We had out typical lunch, she told me about her recent vacation with her son and I showed her recent pictures of our beautiful grandchildren.  I told her I would be in next week for our last lunch.  She smiled and said, "I couldn't have done this without you.  You told me to dump the baggage I was carrying (the relationship) and you told me I could do anything.  I'm gonna try."  

I probably won't see Jamie again.  But I know she will be successful and I know she will be happy.  I didn't leave the restaurant smiling today, I was too busy crying.  My friend is going to fly and she is going to be just fine.