Neighbors

I don't care where you live, if you don't have good neighbors your house can become your prison.  It's no fun being out in the backyard because there they are giving you the hairy eyeball, you have to worry about your pet possibly getting hurt because they can be nasty to small animals and sometimes, they even trespass and make themselves at home on your property.  

And, what can you do about it?  You can't or don't want to  move.  You can't force them to move and usually, you can't reason with them.  So, what do you do? 

We are pretty lucky.  Our neighbors are fine.  But, our friends, Carol and Beecher, who recently moved to a development a few miles away, haven't been so lucky.  They were recently introduced to their newest neighbor, a few streets away from them and they weren't happy.

So, what do you do?  The smart thing....call the animal warden......

   Who in their right mind would make a living putting ropes on the mouth of an 8 foot 
                                  alligator?  And look at the size of those feet!

                   A really fat, angry, 8 foot alligator!  Beware small pets, children and midgets!

I was happy to hear from Carol that the alligator was in their development and not ours until she said, "well, if we have them, you probably have them too."   Swell.  

At least this one was moved somewhere miles away from here.  Good thing for the alligator that Dixie wasn't around, she would have showed it who was boss and kicked some serious alligator butt!

Random Thoughts

I say this every year, but I can't believe that 2019 is almost over.  Tony and I were talking the other day about family events and I realized that my father died 20 years ago.  It doesn't seem that long ago.  How I wish he could have seen his great grandchildren.  He would have loved each and every one of them. 

With the new year just around the corner will come a whole new set of doctors appointments.  Our heart doctor retired, so we will be seeing someone new, Dr. Winslow, probably in December.  We will have our annual physicals to see what new thing we need to worry about and I'm sure we can count on new ultrasounds, especially for my thyroid stuff, and x-rays and who knows what else for people our ages.   

My skin is doing much better.  I have an appointment on Wednesday to talk about next steps.  My arms are clear and my legs are significantly better than they have been in a while.  The open wounds have healed and the redness has subsided. 

In other news, I am officially a registered voter.  I was registered several years ago, but in Ohio juries are selected by voter registration records.  I never thought that I should be on a jury and judge others.  Who am I to judge?

When we moved to North Carolina I was called to jury duty because down here, juries are selected via DMV records.  It took awhile, but I finally got around to registering again and will vote this week on local issues.   I am hoping that Elizabeth Warren secures the Democratic nomination, as I like her views on several of the issues.  

Speaking of powerful women, Dixie will celebrate her 7th birthday on January 6.  I'm trying to decided whether or not to rent a hall for the celebration--the Grand Lanai might work but it's sure to be standing room only!  Dixie seems to be getting younger, not older.  She is full of piss and vinegar and continues to rule the house.   She listens to music with us in the morning as we are easing into the day, watches TV with us, shares pieces of our dinner and sits in the office, in what used to be my chair, as I work on the blog.  She is a people dog and we love her. 

News from Charlotte is that Coleton's baseball team made the playoffs, ranking second overall.  They play this week and we hope they are successful in becoming the champions.  Anthony's season is over (they don't do playoffs)  and he did very well.  

Our next big event, other than Dixie's birthday, is having David, Brenda and Alex for Thanksgiving. Tony and I went shopping a few days ago and got a few trendy looks for Alex to wear while she is here.  Leland needs some style and Alex can certainly provide it.  

We are having the Friedman's over for a clambake in November and that's always a fun event.  Other than that, life goes on and on and on--and aren't we glad. 

I'll be publishing my birthday list soon--and I like expensive stuff--just so you know!

  

Rose and Joe

We have finally come to my favorite time of year.  The leaves are starting to change colors, the air is cool and the breezes are fresh and clean smelling.  I love being outside when it is like this.  There are still birds flying around and the other day, a cardinal landed on one of the Jasmine vines outside of the lanai.  It was big and red and we wondered if it was part of the family of  cardinals that built their nest in the high part of the Jasmine bush earlier this year. 

In addition to visiting birds, we continue to host family and this time it was Rose and Joe.  It was a quick visit, and hopefully a relaxing one for both of them.  Rather than pack the days with trips and events, we opted to go to Brunswick town--a museum that tells the history of area.  It also has remnants of an old church and pieces of the foundations of homes that were built in the 1700's.  

From there, we went to Southport for some shopping and dinner at Oliver's, one of our favorite restaurants.  

On Saturday, Rose and I went to the Compass Pointe Craft Fair and sat at the lazy river, just talking.  After that, we all went to church (I went to a Catholic church, but claimed dispensation if the Pope suffered a heart attack as a result of my visit!)  When we got back, we played an outrageous card game, "Cards Against Humanity."    

I enjoy this type of visit.  We did a lot of talking, laughing and remembering.  I don't think that Rose and I have ever  spent this much one-on-one time together and it was nice to take our relationship to a new level.  

Joe continues his cancer treatments and looked very well.  I finally figured out what a "dry" sense of humor was when I first met Joe.   He can be looking straight at you, not cracking a smile, but he is saying the most off the wall stuff.  He is quietly and creatively funny.  Joe has kind of a crusty shell, but is really a very caring person.  

Dixie, of course, had a great time with two new people here to love her.  Since Rose and Joe stayed in our guest room, Dixie made sure they knew that this was her alternate bedroom and spent as much time as she could sniffing their suitcases and sleeping under the suitcase stand.  Rose and Joe have two Golden Retrievers and are big dog lovers.  Unfortunately, I am terribly allergic to them so when we visit Cleveland, I can't spend any time at their house.  

In other news, I am planning on attending a writer's conference at UNCW in November and am looking forward to exploring writing possibilities again.  I am happy when I am writing and creating written memories. 

And so, the year draws to and end with Thanksgiving coming up and a visit from the Lakeland Swegle's.  

Donna and Bob will be in Sunset Beach in January and February and our cycle of visitors starts all over again. 

It will be good to see everyone again next year. 

Joe and Rose enjoying the weather out on the lanai

The Jasmine vines where the Cardinal visited

New roses near our palm trees

Wispy grass on the small island

A really, really dark picture of us at Oliver's Restaurant

The Christmas wreath/centerpiece that Rose 

bought me from the Craft Fair

Dixie took over my chair in the office since Joe and

Rose took over her other bedroom!

Sports Weekend

We went to Charlotte on Friday to see Coleton and Anthony play baseball (Anthony plays T-ball) on Saturday and to celebrate Anthony's 5th birthday.  Friday evening, we got to spend time with Tony and Marie at a local restaurant for drinks and dessert.  They have a nice,  young lady who babysits for them and she was willing to take care of Dixie, too.  

By mid-November, Tony and Marie will have a new screened in porch directly off of the dining area.  It's going to be really nice, 22 x 16 feet, with fans, heating, a TV, sectional couch, separate chair seating and a dining table that can seat 10 people.  

Eventually, there will be a patio off of the porch, a fire pit and new landscaping.  We can't wait to see it all finished.   

And so, on Saturday, we headed to the ball field.  Coleton's game was first.  He usually plays first base, but the coaches try to rotate the kids to all of the positions.  He did very well.  He hit a home run and a triple.  They won, 13 to 2.  Coleton has a good game sense.  He keeps his eye on the ball when hitting and also where the ball is when he is on base.   He really pays attention when he is playing first base.  He has his eye on the batter and ball and has caught some line drives.  He got the game ball on Saturday for the home run!

Anthony's game was entertaining.  From a grandparent perspective, I think that Anthony could probably play with Coleton's team (the 6 and 7 year olds) because he, too, is very good.  His father says he's a "natural" and I saw why.  Many of the kids had to hit the ball from the "tee."  But, Anthony has been hitting coach pitched balls for awhile now.  He hits, he runs and he runs fast.  He also runs with his tongue out, which I find endearing.

Most of the kids on Anthony's team didn't know much about baseball, especially when playing the field.  At one point, one of the coaches picked up the ball and a little boy who was playing center field and ran him over to where the play should have been made.  The coaches are really good with the team.  They give them lots of encouragement and at the end of the game, have them slap hands with the other team and say, "good game."  Then they have their coach meeting where the head coach tells them how they have improved, what they need to work on and then recognizes someone on the team who played well with the game ball.  Liam, who was playing third base got the game ball.  He was hit in the right elbow with a line drive.  The ball missed his glove and hit him really hard.  He started to cry.  (Yes, everyone was saying, "there's no crying in baseball!!")  I think getting the game ball took away a lot of the pain. 

Not only did I enjoy the games, I enjoyed the names of the team members.  There was Hunter, Porter, Austin, Liam, Jax and Weston.  No Jimmy's, Bobby's or Ben's.  Of course, in 1976, few people had heard of the name, Jenna, either!

Owen watched Coleton's game and you can tell, he'll be out there soon--if the trend continues, I'm guessing his name will go well with the other players!  He still likes to eat, more than anything, but he is spending more time playing with his brothers.   It's been three months since they lost Tyson,  but for whatever reason, Owen was afraid of Dixie.  He would only pet Dixie if someone was holding her face away from him.  She spent a lot of time upstairs in the guest bedroom or on her leash, attached to something.  But, she did get to run around when Marie, Anthony and Coleton were playing football in the great room.  They called her, "Jaws," because she would get the nose of the football in her teeth and not let go.  I think she scored a few touch downs!

After that, it was time to give Anthony his birthday present and then go home.  It was a fun and as always, loud visit. 

On Sunday, we went to the Brown's Backers at the Reel Cafe.  It was an exciting, but difficult game.  I think there were at least two times when the officials stiffed us, but, they wear the stripes, not me.  It was fun to be among other Brown's fans and in downtown Wilmington.  I am always pleased to see so much activity on Sunday, unlike when we were in Cleveland.  Sunday in downtown Cleveland was quiet and empty.  In Wilmington, the restaurants are open, you hear music playing, the horse drawn tours are taking people through the city, the Cape Fear River is busy and people are all over the River Walk.  

Rose and Joe will be in soon and next week, Sam will 11 years old and Zach will be 8. I thought I told them not to grow!

David, Brenda and Alex will be in for Thanksgiving and that will end our visitors for 2019.  

Check out our photos:

Owen, Mr. Hungry

Doing "slap hands" with Papa

Our newest 5 year old...

...stealing raspberries from the fruit salad!

Notice Owen's look.  Coleton is holding Dixie is just out of the frame, 

but Owen wants to make sure she's not coming after him.  

Owen watches Coleton's game

Coleton up to bat...

The batter's stance

Keeping his eye on the ball...

...And he connects.  You can see the ball in mid-air, 

just under one of the bats hanging on the fence

Getting ready to run....

...And there he goes...

....Jumping on home base!  It's a home run!

It's Anthony up to bat across the field...

He hits....

...And he's off

....Passing second base.....

...Heading to third!

Standing on third, where he scored on the next pitch

The many faces of Owen.....here, with Papa

Mommy is behind me, cracking Owen up!

Thoughtful

Watching college football with brothers

Coleton takes his sports very seriously

Anthony, my heart...

Opening the "Slammin' Sluggers" game we got him 

Dixie attempting an interception during the Swegle Bowl....

but loses the ball to a forward pass to Mommy from Anthony....

Mommy does a quarterback sneak, with the ball behind her back...

And throws the ball......

...To Daddy.  Dixie does a leap and attempts to force a fumble....

Dixie intercepts a throw to Coleton....

....they don't call her "Jaws" for nothing....

Coleton acknowledges the Dixie touchdown so she will release the ball....

Enjoying the score, before she got into the back 

seat of the car and slept all the way home!

I'll Miss You, Jamie

Sometimes it's surprising who touches your life.  It could be a doctor, a friend, a relative or someone that you only see once in a while. 

That's what happened to me.  A while ago, I started therapy for a number of reasons.  Some of the sessions were really hard.  You explore your life, your rationale, your choices, your failures and you take a hard look at yourself.  Sometimes, you don't like what you see. 

After one of these sessions, I was hungry.  I decided to stop at a local restaurant before going home.  Instead of opting for a table, I decided to just sit at the bar and grab a sandwich.  

I was lost in my thoughts, not really looking at the menu, not really aware of where I was.  My mind was still at the session, going over words and events.  A young lady behind the bar came up to me and said, "girl, you look like you have trouble, what's going on?"  I told her that  I was fine.  She kind of made a noise and said something to the effect of, "if you're fine, you wouldn't be sitting at a bar looking the way you look.  What's up?"  After a while, I finally told her that I had just come from therapy and was struggling with stuff in general.  

And that was the start of a nice, but unusual friendship.  For awhile, I went to see Jamie regularly.  We would talk about the session and she would take out the therapy-speak and talk honestly about the paths people take and why.   I wondered if I should be paying her instead of the therapist.  

We shared many things.  I found out that she was in an abusive relationship and that working at the restaurant was not her ultimate career choice, but it paid the bills her husband did not.  

I watched her as she interacted with customers.  She was amazing.  She remembered drink choices, favorite foods, birthdays, recent illnesses and names of children and grandchildren.  She made everyone feel special.  And, at the end of every visit, she would say, "take care of yourself and be careful out there."  

Skeptics would say that she does all of this for tips, but I don't think so.  Maybe she was in tune with people because of the relationship she was in.  Maybe it's just in her nature to be aware of others.  Whatever it was, people left smiling.  

I stopped in today for lunch and she was there.  She approached me and said, "I have to tell you something."  The last time she said that to me, she told me she left her abusive partner, so I was at a loss for what was coming next. 

"I'm leaving here," she said.  "I got a great job offer."  It turns out that people who sat at the bar on a regular basis saw her customer service skills and offered her a job dealing with their clients.  She won't have to work weekends or odd shifts.  Plus, the money she will make is much better than restaurant pay and tips. 

I was sad, but thrilled.  We had out typical lunch, she told me about her recent vacation with her son and I showed her recent pictures of our beautiful grandchildren.  I told her I would be in next week for our last lunch.  She smiled and said, "I couldn't have done this without you.  You told me to dump the baggage I was carrying (the relationship) and you told me I could do anything.  I'm gonna try."  

I probably won't see Jamie again.  But I know she will be successful and I know she will be happy.  I didn't leave the restaurant smiling today, I was too busy crying.  My friend is going to fly and she is going to be just fine. 

OLD FRIENDS, NEW MEMORIES

Did you ever have one of those friends who you could be separated from for  years but when  you reconnect, it's like you never stopped talking?

A few days ago, I got a letter from my friend, Pat Mason.  Pat and I met when we both worked for Ohio Savings.  I often tell the story that I was sitting in this room with all of the new hires filling out paperwork.  For whatever reason, I looked around the room and saw Pat.  She was professional looking, well groomed and there was something about her that screamed, "this chick is a hoot."  She had a laugh that made you laugh and a quick wit.  I knew that not only would we be friends, we would be accomplices.  

And I was right.  We quickly hit it off and have been friends ever since.  We lost contact when I moved to North Carolina and that was sad.  Stuff would happen at work and I'd want to talk to Pat and get her take on it.  I wanted to call her and cry when I had lonely thoughts about how far away Jenna, Jon and the kids are.  But mostly, I wanted to hear her voice and laugh at the silly things we get ourselves into.  

And that's what we did today.  The years melted away, we talked about our children and I was proud to tell Pat that we have 8 beautiful grandchildren.  She used to have a picture of Ben in her bedroom.  He was about 2 and she loved his big, blue eyes.  She was amazed to realize that he is now 13!   Pat and Darryl, her husband, attended Tony and Marie's wedding in 2011.  She just couldn't believe that they now have 3 boys--Coleton, Anthony and Owen.  Pat isn't a grandmother  yet, but I'm sure she will be soon!

And so, as we have often said, "God watches over us," and today, he brought us back together.    Thanks, God!

I'll be sending Pat pictures of the grandchildren she hasn't met yet:

Alexandra at her baptism

Alex and Owen

Marie with Owen, Brenda with Alex, David with Coleton

 in front of him and Tony Jr with Anthony

Alex today at 2 years old 

Coleton and Anthony with the game balls they both won at T Ball

Owen