A Place In The Family

It's funny--winter here can be just like Cleveland.  Oh, I don't mean the snow and all that comes with it, but how quickly the temperature can change.  

We were at our favorite wine bar yesterday and someone said, "I tell people that if they don't like the weather here in Wilmington, just wait 5 minutes and it will change."  Ha Ha, didn't we say the same thing about Cleveland weather?  

Today was an odd day.  It was down right gloomy, but the wind was strong.  It moved the tall grasses and made them swing back and forth.  It made the vinyl  windows in the lanai stutter.  The windows reflected the Christmas lights from our small tree and the twinkle lights hanging around the lanai and when the vinyl windows shook, it made the lights look like they were bouncing and dancing.  It was pretty.  

Christmas is just around the corner.  We did our cyber thing and went to the mall yesterday.  I was happy there.  My fit bit said I walked 4,045 steps.  That's a high for me this month, but it did not come without sitting down on the way from store to store and drinking water.   I remember days at the hospital when I did 10,000 steps and felt good about it.  Today, I am lucky to hit 1500.  Damn, it sucks to get old.  

We've started to get Christmas cards from the kids and can't believe what beautiful grandchildren we have.  Alex is a stunner and hasn't taken a bad picture ever.  She was in her first school Christmas pageant and, of course, was the cutest one on the stage.

We will be going to Charlotte on December 26, to have Christmas with Tony Jr., Marie and the kids.  That's always a fun and deafening visit.   They are so energetic and full of stuff to tell us.  It's great.  Owen has had some growth challenges, but I'm sure he will be on track soon.  Coleton is in to golf and Anthony is still my heart.  I understand that he can be a challenge, unruly and rude (per his daddy, not me), buy hey, look at the research on middle children (of which I am one....) and you will find that they need extra attention and a specific role in the family--they are not the special first born and they are not the cute, last baby.  They need a place of their own in the family where they feel valued and not invisible.  If they don't feel valued, they probably will be unruly and rude, but they are saying, "see me, value me."  OK, I guess that gives you a good idea of how we grew up. 

Since my sister, Fritz and I have reconnected, we have spent a lot of time dissecting our individual childhood memories.  While I felt invisible, she felt stupid and dismissed.  We both remember specific remarks that still cut deep.  To this day, I don't think she realizes how smart and talented she is. Our mutual concern is that we did the same thing to our children for different reasons.  That doesn't make it better and we share our motherhood regrets.  

On a lighter note, Donna and Bob will be coming from Cleveland to Sunset Beach in January and we are looking forward to more adventures.  We will celebrate Tony's 73rd birthday in February and continue to wonder how he got so old while the rest of us are forever young (yeah, right!)

Speaking of birthdays, Dixie will be 7 on January 6.  Tony is "iffy" on getting her another toy for Christmas since she has so many, so I'm not sure how he's going to react to the Dixie birthday bash I am planning!

And, that's about all that is happening in Wilmington.  Dixie is well and still full of piss and vinegar.  She continues to train us and even though we are slow learners, she manages to get what she wants.  Spoiled "child," yeah, probably, but we love her. 

Speaking of love:

Brenda, Alex and David getting ready for Christmas

Alex, reading the book that Tony and I did for her

Puppy love

This is the look we get when we have caught Dixie doing something wrong!

This is Dixie saying, "talk to the paw, the ear isn't listening!"

Play time!

  
Coming soon:  I can't wait to post pictures of the Charlotte Swegle's and our Christmas visit.  


  

Cyber

I've never considered myself to be a techie person.  I'm not particularly computer savvy  and I can just barely function in Word, Excel and email.  That being said, shopping on the computer is not something I really ever got into. 

When I shop for something that I want, I go to the mall.  I want to see the thing I am trying to buy, I want to feel it, try it on, hold it up to the light, sit in it, walk in it--whatever I need to do to ensure that what I'm looking at is what I want to buy.  

Unfortunately, our kids have a different idea about shopping.  To them, shopping means that you get your jammies on, sit on the couch, grab your laptop and start looking at various shopping web sites until you find what you are looking for.  You put the order in online and wait for your merchandise to show up on your front door.  And, if it isn't what you wanted or is the wrong size, no problem, just return it--and keep returning it until you get the right thing.  Easier than going to the mall?  I'm not convinced yet. 

And so, when we ask for Christmas ideas for all of the grandkids, guess what we got?  Yup...emails full of blue links to websites.  

Yesterday was cyber Monday meaning some sites, mainly Amazon,  had good sales on various merchandise.  So, we jumped into the cyber world with both feet and worked on the gifts for our Cleveland grandkids.

I ordered one thing at a time (I had it in my mind that ordering two things on the same order would somehow screw it up) and printed out a confirmation page for each order.  Tony has done this before, so he is more confident than I am. 

Everything seemed to work until we got to the last item.  Of course, the last item.  We think it went through, but we're not sure if it went through, but we got a confirmation and confirmation number, but the confirmation said that it didn't ship.  So, did it go through or not?   

Hmmm....when I go to the mall and buy something, it's in my hand and then in my bag, so I know the transaction went through.   Easier than going to the mall?  I'm not sure yet.

So here's where we stand--we ordered a gift online, but not on Amazon, through a store.  We didn't get the item sent here, we ordered it through a store in Ohio and had it delivered to the store.  In processing our online order, we were designated as the "payor," but we had to designate Jon to be the pick up person and supply his email address.  Tony called Jon to let him know the item was ordered and processed and today, during lunch, Jon went to the store to pick it up.  We still don't know if the "confirmed not shipped" order is confirmed and processed or sitting in limbo.  But, we did successfully order two things that we hope will be delivered on Thursday--to Cleveland.  

Easier than going to the mall?  I'm not sure yet.

My biggest fear is that on Christmas day, Tony's phone will ring and it will be the kids from Cleveland saying, "Hi Papa, thank you for my confirmation number!"  

Tony and I used to chuckle about our parents being afraid to try new things.  It was hard for us to imagine that they would be so tentative about doing something a new way.   But, I get it now.  Why mess with progress when the old way works so well.  OMG, I am my mother. 

Alexandra

What energy a child brings into the house.  David, Brenda and Alex are here and it's been non-stop action ever since.  Alex turned 2 in September, but to listen to her count to 20, say her ABC's and sing songs in English and then Spanish, you would think she's a lot older.  But, she is just as petite and beautiful as she has always been.  

Her vocabulary is amazing and entertaining.  She will say a word or phrase and if you say, "Espanol" she will repeat it to you in Spanish.   She is the only bilingual child in her class and she often tells her teachers what shapes and figures are in Spanish.  When they try to correct her and tell her the English word, she says, "no!" and tells them in Spanish again.  I think that's her way of trying to teach them another language--they already know the word in English!

She watches Brenda do yoga in the morning and she can do some of the poses.  She starts out by taking in a big deep breath--I mean a big deep breath and then she puts her hands over her head.  She can do "downward facing dog," but she calls it the Mommy pose.  She does the warrior and then proclaims, "I am strong!" and she stands on one foot, touching her toe on the other foot that is stretched out in front of her.  

We went to an Italian restaurant last night and she was very well behaved.  She had a cheese pizza and some bread and watched cartoons on Daddy's phone while we ate.  When we got back into the car after dinner, she announced, "Alexandra farted."  It was a simple fact and she wanted us to know.  I had to laugh, we weren't allowed to say that word in the house when we were growing up and here she is announcing it to anyone who wanted to know!  

She brought her Elmo potty with her and sat on it in the living room.  Keep in mind she was fully dressed, she was just practicing.  It also makes a flushing noise, so she enjoyed "flushing" her non-existent pee!

After dinner today, we are going to decorate our small tree on the lanai.  That was the very first thing her Mommy and I did when Brenda came to share Thanksgiving with us before she and David were married. I can't wait to see Alex decorating!

More adventures and photos to come.....

Enjoying a breezy day with her hair bow in her eyes

Watching Dixie

A beautiful face

Practicing on her Elmo potty

Fun with Mommy

Going to dinner

Tony and I bought her a table and chair so she could color. 

 She says, "this is my chair!"  Yes it it, baby!

Helping Daddy cut bread for stuffing....put a piece in the bowl, eat a piece

Opening her gift from Aunt Rose

Listening to the letter from Aunt Rose

Holding her treasure box from Aunt Rose

Reading the book that Tony and I did for her

Getting Ready

I have always felt that this time of year puts us in a "getting ready" mode.  

We're getting ready for David, Brenda and Alex to share Thanksgiving with us and we're getting ready for Christmas. 

But, we are getting ready for other things too.  For once, Tony has had more doctors appointments than I have.  Most are routine, but he does have a few aches and pains.  I am stable at this point.  No news is good news.  So, we are getting ready to go into 2020 with good health and well being.  

We are getting ready for Dixie to turn 7 in January and hope that her "puppy behavior " doesn't change once she matures.  We love to watch her run in circles around the office, or run to get her toy so we can throw it for her (we are very well trained!)  The other day I was in the office and had the door closed.  From out in the hallway, I heard Dixie; she had her red squeak dog in her mouth and was making it squeak.  She was scratching at the door and wanted to come in so we could play.  The longer I left her out there, the more the toy was making noise.   

As soon as I let her in, we were running around, wrestling on the floor and the squeak toy and flying thorough the air.  What Dixie wants, Dixie gets!

We are also getting ready for our grandchildren to be getting older. Our oldest, Ben, will be 14 next year and our babies will be toddlers.   In a way, that's sad--it's so nice to have a baby to cuddle!

And finally, I'm getting ready for my 50th, High School reunion that will be held in Westlake in October.  I only went to my 10 year reunion and realized that the cool kids were still the cool kids and the reunion was theirs.  Hopefully, time has made them less cool.  

I was both sad and surprised to see the Memorial list for my class.  My dear friend, Felicia (we called her Fish) apparently had a short life and I hope to find out what happened to her.  In 1970, I was the Maid of Honor at her wedding and every year, on December 5, I remember Fish.

It's time to go back to cleaning and getting ready.  I will end this post with pictures of Dixie--getting ready for and doing lots of things!!

Getting ready to start the day...in Daddy's robe

Getting ready to nap with puppy dog!

Getting ready to help us play cornhole

Getting ready for another nap with puppy!

Getting ready to play "fetch the puppy!"

Getting ready to get out from under the covers and greet the day!!

   

Fun Days, Busy Days

Sunday was a fun day.  Fun, mostly because the Browns won against Buffalo (sorry, David.)  We went to the Reel Cafe, who hosts the Browns Backers Club.  We go most Sundays, but when the Browns lose, it's not as much fun to be there.  Tony said it wasn't that the Browns played better than Buffalo, but that Buffalo had bad luck.  I agree, but a win is a win!  Go Browns!!

On Saturday, we had the Friedman's over for a clambake.  It was a beautiful night with a big, white moon and warm enough to sit on the lanai without jackets.  The clambake was really good.  The clams were cooked just right and the chicken was so tender, it fell apart.   Tony had a fire going outside and the air smelled of fall weather and Cleveland memories.  Jan Friedman made the best cherry cheesecake for dessert which enhanced the evening together even more. 

Today is Veteran's Day.  We are going to the beach, possibly for the last time this season.  I can't wait to see the waves, smell the ocean and have a nice picnic.  I really appreciate it when Tony wears his Air Force Veteran hat and people thank him for his service.  He is a proud vet, and should be.  When I went with him to Fayetteville for his DAV physical, his contact there just raved about him.  Tony is a "give back" kind of guy and he enjoys driving other vets to their doctor's appointments and chatting about their military experiences.   

Now that it's "fireplace" weather, we like to ease into the day with a fire in the fireplace, coffee and music on Alexa by Ann Sweeten.  Today, we didn't exactly "ease" into the day--it was more like a woof and a paw kind of day.  Dixie got us up early and then relaxed on the couch between us.  I think she enjoys the music as much as we do.    

We are already working on Christmas ideas for "the kids" and can't wait to see David, Brenda and Alexandra for Thanksgiving.    For the last few years, Brenda and I have decorated our small Christmas tree after Thanksgiving dinner.  This year we will have Alex to help and I'm hoping to get some good pictures of her efforts.   I wonder if she will recognize the ornament with her picture on it as being her when she was a baby.   I went shopping and got her some "cold" weather clothes for her time in Leland.  Cold weather clothes translates to stuff with long sleeves and long pants! Gee, it should be in the 50's when they are here!  BRRRRR!

And so, the beach is calling.  Too bad Dixie would rather lounge on the couch than go to the beach.  I wonder what she does when we're gone...

Getting into the treats

Hiding her treats so we don't know she found them 

Messing around with Daddy after being busted (with treats)

Napping after treats

Having a bad hair day

Wondering why I don't have a Dixie bumper sticker

Resting in the office

Taking over Daddy's chair

More resting!!!

After the spa day

Watching the world go by

The Writer's Conference At UNCW

I have wanted to be a writer since I was very young.  I remember telling my parents what I wanted to do and my father told me that writing wasn't a real job.  

Yes it is.  

On Monday, I attended "Writers Week" at UNCW.  It was the first day of learning about the craft, talking to published professionals, having your work audited and listening to lectures on various types of writing.  

It was wonderful.  Just to be a part of writing conversations and thinking about ways you can express yourself was really great.   

We wrote short essays in 3 separate genres, heard different perspectives on writing and got to ask questions about the publishing and editing process. 

One of the speakers was Melody Moezzi.  She is an Iranian American Muslin author, an attorney and political activist.  She's written several books and is a United Nations global expert.  She spoke a lot about rage.  It seemed funny to me at first, but she told us that many writers got their start by being really, really angry about something (usually social injustice.)  Rage in writing puts emotions on a page--and if done correctly, can be very powerful and moving to the audience without creating havoc.  

We also heard from Clyde Edgerton.  He has published 10 novels, many about living in the Wilmington area.  However, according to him, one of his proudest accomplishments is being banned from the New Hanover County school system for writing and talking about the shortcomings in the system, especially in the financial area.  He, too, had a lot to say about rage!

I sat with a lady named Betty Belle Brown.  She published a book called, "Pretty Much," which is about her relationship with her mother.  She did it through a vanity press, which basically means she paid to have it published with the hope that selling it on Amazon would get it picked up in major bookstores.  She was fascinating.  It turns out she is 83 years old (I thought we were the same age....) and has lived a very interesting life.  She is also a painter and teaches at various venues.  She was motivating and funny!

I enjoyed the day so much.  The writing seminar at UNCW happens only once a year, but I found that there are a few other writing avenues I can explore.  This has opened a door and a place for me that I can't wait to enter and explore.

Today, Tony and I had a lanai picnic at the Grand Lanai.  Another fun day!

David, Brenda and Alex will be here in 2 weeks.  More fun!

The brochure detailing events

Our lanai picnic

Tony getting ready to pour the wine

Neighbors

I don't care where you live, if you don't have good neighbors your house can become your prison.  It's no fun being out in the backyard because there they are giving you the hairy eyeball, you have to worry about your pet possibly getting hurt because they can be nasty to small animals and sometimes, they even trespass and make themselves at home on your property.  

And, what can you do about it?  You can't or don't want to  move.  You can't force them to move and usually, you can't reason with them.  So, what do you do? 

We are pretty lucky.  Our neighbors are fine.  But, our friends, Carol and Beecher, who recently moved to a development a few miles away, haven't been so lucky.  They were recently introduced to their newest neighbor, a few streets away from them and they weren't happy.

So, what do you do?  The smart thing....call the animal warden......

   Who in their right mind would make a living putting ropes on the mouth of an 8 foot 
                                  alligator?  And look at the size of those feet!

                   A really fat, angry, 8 foot alligator!  Beware small pets, children and midgets!

I was happy to hear from Carol that the alligator was in their development and not ours until she said, "well, if we have them, you probably have them too."   Swell.  

At least this one was moved somewhere miles away from here.  Good thing for the alligator that Dixie wasn't around, she would have showed it who was boss and kicked some serious alligator butt!