Getting Busy

We are doing a quick trip back to Cleveland this weekend for Emma's first communion.  So it's in Friday night, communion and party on Saturday and out on Sunday.  After that, we go to South Carolina to stay in a B&B.  Just what retired people need--a vacation!! 

The weather is absolutely beautiful now.  This is when I love North Carolina most.  The mornings and evenings are cool and during the day, there is a soft breeze.  Flowers are still blooming and it's nice to be outside.  It will be cold in Cleveland, but that's OK--it's Cleveland!

I am still writing for Cape Fear Voices, but I am now doing some research work as well.  We are putting out a glossy magazine in January, 2021 about the effects of Covid so I am researching the international aspect for another writer who has been nationally published.  It is interesting work.  International will be the smallest section of the magazine so it is a good way for me to learn how to research and how to work with another writer.   

There are several of us on this project and we have our meetings via "Zoom," an online application that allows you to have virtual meetings.  You can see everyone on the call, but you are in your own home.  Thank goodness Brenda had a legal meeting when she and David were here visiting so she downloaded Zoom to our computer.  I felt positively computer savvy!

We are going into what I call "birthday" mode.  Starting in September, we have several family birthday's that take us right through December.  For the grandchildren;  Alex turned 3 on September 26, Anthony will be 6 on October 5, Sam will be 12 on October 15 and Zach will be 9 on October 18.  

Tony and I watched the first presidential debate and thought that T-rump did a great job--of making Biden look good!   I can't wait until T-rump is out of office and prosecuted for all of the laws he has broken as president.  

The fact that he paid $750 in federal income tax for two years just really put me over the edge.  It reminded me of 1976.  I was widowed that year and found out that I had paid more in federal taxes that Richard Nixon because he "donated" so much to his library.   There is something fundamentally wrong with this country when stuff like that can happen.   

Dixie is doing well, but we can see more and more gray hair coming in around her face and on her ears.  She will be 8 in January, but is still very much a puppy.  She will be vacationing with her Godparents while we are in Cleveland.   That means home cooked chicken meals,  sleeping on whatever bed she wants and having the run of the fenced in backyard.   Look out, bunnies, she won't be leashed!

And so, that's about it in Leland.  We continue to hope that a Covid remedy is found quickly and that no more people have to die because of it.  

One of my favorite pictures of Alex.  Happy Birthday, 3!

RBG

I wrote on Facebook the impact that Ruth Bader Ginsburg's death had on me.  I said that I don't cry for politicians or judges, but I cried when I found out that RBG had died.   

Tony and I saw the movie about her life, "On the Basis of Sex," and the documentary, RBG.  Like her, both were powerful and thought provoking.   I have often said, that the only basic difference between men and women is the manner in which we pee.  People would laugh when I said that, but think about it.   Think about that for a minute.  Do men have an extra pair of hands?  Legs built of steel?  X-ray vision?  No.  Do they have an extra brain?  No.  So why would anyone think that women are intellectually inferior?  Why would law professors criticize women for being accepted into a law program because they "took up a space a man could have."  Did women take different tests to get into the program?  Was there a pink test that had easy questions on it?  No.  At every turn in her youth, she was questioned.  Not for her ability, but for her gender.  

RBG was my hero because as my career progressed, I faced some of the same scrutiny, and it made me angry.   Years ago when I worked for Chemical Bank, our division moved into a new facility, the management team took a tour.    When we got to my office, a male peer (Vice President, exact same title) of mine turned to our SVP and asked, "How come she gets such a big office?"  Keep in mind, our offices were the same size.  Our SVP, responded, "To reflect her responsibilities, just like yours."   Why would my male peer even think he had the right to question the size of my office?

There was also a time when family members were discussing work.  My husband, who has always been proud of my work ethic, said, "Jan is at her desk every day by 7:00, even though the work day doesn't start until 8:30."  At that point, a male family member looked at me and said, "why, do you have to make the coffee?"  Tony jumped back into the conversation, and said, "she has people who make coffee for her."  I wouldn't ask people to make me coffee, but I got his point.  The male family member didn't.  He wasn't criticizing me, to him the only reason why a female would be at her desk an hour and a half early was to get the coffee ready for the men. 

These are the attitudes that Ruth faced so many years ago.  I'm guessing our daughters are still facing those same attitudes.  Why?    Women are as good as men and every woman should know that, remember that and live by that. 

And so, my hero has died.  Here are some of her words that made her my hero :

"A gender line helps to keep women, not on a pedestal, but in a cage."

"Woman belong in all places where decisions are being made. It shouldn't be that women are the exception."

"I would like to be remembered as someone who used whatever talent she had to do her work to the very best of her ability."

                                            And my personal favorite.....

When asked when will there be enough women on the Supreme Court, she replied:

"When there are nine."  (The audience she was addressing, laughed at her comment.)  She explained, "There have been nine men on the Supreme Court and no one ever raised a question about that."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg was not "anti-man," she was pro, "be the best you can be."

Now, that's a hero.

 

Baby Yoga

The highs and lows of depression are still with me, but since David, Brenda and Alex have been visiting, I find myself laughing.  Really laughing. 

Alex is quite the entertainer.  She does Baby Yoga, sings songs, dances, counts and colors; while telling me what color she is using in English and then in Spanish. 

I am usually the last one up in the morning and when I make my way to the lanai where everyone is enjoying coffee, Alex sees me and runs to me with her arms open, ready to jump up and give me a big hug.

She puts her head on my shoulder and I whisper, "Did you have a good sleep?"  And she answers quietly, "yes....did you have a good sleep Momo?"   I could be happy waking up every day that way.   

We went downtown for dinner last night and she was so well behaved.  She had chicken and fruit and then we came home and had a small birthday party with cupcakes and ice cream.  She sang "Happy Birthday," with us and seemed to enjoy her presents.  We got her a pretty dress with a wide brimmed hat that she wears with the attitude of a super fashion model. 

She is back in school now and named off all of her classmates and teachers.  She is such a happy little thing.  She gets joy out of our twinkle lights and butterflies.  I put the lava lamp on the first night she was here and she lightly touched it.  I told her it was not hot, so now whenever she sees it, she states, "Momo, not hot."  

We played kickball in the back yard and she was fascinated by the yellow plastic flower in the Zeno's yard that spins in the wind.  Sometimes being with her is like seeing something ordinary in a very special way.  

I think when they go back to Florida, I'll be doing Baby Yoga.  I won't do it as well as Alex did, but it will bring back sweet memories. 

Pictures later......

The Highs and the Lows

 

I think that the trip home to Cleveland a few weeks ago took more out of me than I thought it would.  I was so excited to see everyone and get together for birthday dinners and social lunches.  But now that I'm back, I feel empty.  My depression is at an all time high and even getting out of bed is a chore.  

Maybe it was interacting with so many different people in a short period of time.  Maybe it was negative conversations.  Who knows?  But whatever it was, I can't shake it.

I'm being published again in Cape Fear Voices--and I'll be in a special glossy edition, but even that doesn't light me up like it should.  Depression is like having someone sitting on the top of your head.  It's heavy and it follows you all around.  I'm tired of being depressed.  

And now, it's September, fall--my favorite time of year.  Alex will be 3 at the end of the month and we get to see her next week.  I have been practicing my colors in Spanish, but she is probably way past that now.    

I've been writing letters to the Cleveland grandkids in response to the Birthday letters they gave me.  Each of them are so different.  I sent Ben a check for his birthday and it was cashed the other day.  I'm not sure why, but I looked at the back of the check when it hit my account.  He printed his name so Jenna could co-sign and cash it and I realized that he doesn't write in cursive.  I guess keyboarding has eliminated the need for learning cursive.   He is in public school now and I worry that he will feel out of place since he has been home schooled.  He's really cute, so I know the young ladies will like him.  I just hope that these final school years will give him good memories. 

Of all of the letters, Ellie's was the most entertaining.  It was more like a conversation than a letter.  As odd as it sounds, I felt like she writes like I do.  She starts on a subject, interjects a related thought and then says something funny.  She included a "PS" in her letter that said it only took her less than 30 minutes to type out her letter and that she was proud of herself.  Ellie has a strong sense of self that I hope she never loses.

Sam looks so much like Bill, Jenna's father.  He is athletic and gifted.  He played the banjo for us and he was very good. 

Zach is the sweetest kid.  He's quiet, but funny.  He can twist his body around like my sister, Fritz, used to.  Jon says Zach is not double jointed, but he sure looks like he is.

I'm glad we got to see them.  And, I have included a picture which to me is typical of 2020.  Sitting in a garage due to the virus.

The Visit Home

We spent the last week in Cleveland celebrating birthdays and seeing family.   What a good time we had, but as I call 2020 the year of nothing, I have to call this trip, the visit of food.  Between meeting people for lunches and dinners, it's safe to say that we added a few pounds--oh good, just what I need. 

One of the events was "Neighborhood Lunch."  Since I've been on Facebook, I've reconnected with several of our neighbors from West 100 St.  We decided to get together, so 7 of us went to Olive Garden in Middleburg Heights.  We talked for over 2 hours and had a great time catching up.  It's amazing how young we all looked!!

I also reconnected with my best friend from 4th grade, Debbie Onody.  I haven't seen her in 40 years.  She has 5 children and 3 grandsons.  We had a fun time remembering school chums over lunch.  We had "friendship" necklaces when we were young, so I bought us both necklaces that celebrate that bond.  It was so good to see her again. 

Seeing the grandchildren was hard.  That must sound odd, but Jenna and Jon are taking Covid very seriously.  We had to wear masks, stay 6 feet away and not hug the children.  It just broke my heart to be that close to them and not be able to squeeze and love them.  

The last time we saw them, they still seemed small and as I remembered them.  But this time, they all got so big, especially Ben.  He is 5'8" or 9" now and taller than we are.  He stood next to Tony (6 feet apart) and I immediately thought of that little boy who always wanted piggy back rides from Papa.  

The children are all very talented.  Sam played the banjo, Ben played the ukulele and sang, Ellie did some gymnastics and Zach showed us some Tae Kwondo defensive moves.  They are learning how to play tennis and even jump on a pogo stick.  They were not able to be on swim team this year because of the virus.  

Sam is starting to look more like Jenna, although, I've always said he looked like her father, Bill, so I guess that makes sense.  Ben favors Jon and Ellie and Zach favor both of their parents.  Ellie has the most beautiful smile and Zach is sweet and funny.   

I cried so much during our visit.  I cried because they were so big, I cried because I couldn't touch them and I cried because they are so beautiful.  I will post pictures of them soon. 

In the meantime, I have posted beautiful birthday flowers from the Charlotte Swegle's and a picture of our Neighborhood Lunch. 

From left:  Lynn Viancour, Back Row: Earl Melvin, Donna (Viancour) Andrassy, Peggy (Quarando) Szabo,

 Ralph Quarando, Front:  Jan (Viancour) Morgan-Swegle, Gail (Doane) O' Dell

Missing due to health reasons:  Linda (Doane) Yamamotto, Gordon Hathaway

Flowers from the Charlotte Swegle's  for my birthday

Published!

 

Yesterday, I got two copies of the Cape Fear Voices issue that published my story about the snake in our lanai.  It was a thrill to see my thoughts in print again and I'm trying to submit another article before we leave for Cleveland.  

I love writing again, although, I feel a bit hemmed in because the articles are restricted to 700 words.  Anything over that has to be published in installments.

Cape Fear Voices is a new, small paper dedicated to featuring the diverse points of view of the people in the community.  The Leland area is one of the fastest growing in the country and is less "locals" and more east coast/midwest every day.  

I am really looking forward to our Cleveland trip and seeing our grandchildren again.  OK, it will be behind masks and there will be no hugging, but at least I can see them and talk to them.  No matter what restrictions or how long the visit, I am so excited to see them.  

I think this is the first time in a long time that we will have seen most of our grandchildren in a 2 month period (Owen didn't visit.)  The first part of August, Tony Jr., Coleton and Anthony visited and in September, David, Brenda and Alex will be here. It's hard to believe that in a little over 3 weeks, it will be September.  2020, the year of nothing, marches on.  

Dixie will be staying with her Godparents for the week we are in Cleveland.  She will miss barking at people while she's sitting on the back of Tony's reclining chair with him, but I know she will enjoy extra treats and extra love while we are gone. 

Here's my  first Cape Fear Voices entry"

Mother Nature

I'm not sure how I ended up with dots on my text, but I will figure it out  before my next post. 

• One of my favorite commercials of all times is "Mother Nature."  I think the commercial is about selling margarine but everyone thinks it's butter--including Mother Nature.  She's not happy when she finds out she has been fooled, so she raises her arms above her head and says, "It's not nice to fool Mother Nature." After that you hear loud crashes of thunder and see wicked lines of lightening.  You get the message. 
• 
  
• Well, Mother Nature sure likes to fool us.  I think Tony said we have had 4 hurricanes in 5 years--the latest Isaias (which I understand is pronounced E-Sigh-A-Us) made landfall at the South Carolina/North Carolina border last night.   As it moved inland, the eye was 8 miles West of our house.   
• 
  
• That sounds pretty scary, but we only had one tree down and the same pot of flowers that went down during the last storm, went down again.  We were very lucky.  One of our favorite cities, Southport, was not so lucky.  Southport is a sea side community, with many residents living on boats--well, actually, they lived on boats, many of the boats in the harbor were damaged to the point of being totaled, as was the pier.  Huge sand slides were all over the roads and lawns of residents and cars were pushed into each other and turned over. 

Jokes about trailer parks didn't seem funny today, as a park was totally destroyed, killing a few people and leaving 2 small children still missing.  

Chunks of bridges in various places are gone, and water damage in the Outer Banks is again severe.  

For a small moment in time, we forgot about masks, our stupid president and the virus.

David, Brenda and Alex were totally missed, as was my cousin and her husband in Beaufort, South Carolina, and for that, we are most grateful.  

Dixie spent most of the time before the storm shaking and hiding under the bed.  We stumbled over something that makes her feel safe--a laundry basket.  Tony just picked her up the other day and put her in one I had on the floor.  She seemed to like having "walls" all around her and being able to see out.  I put one of her blankets in the bottom and she rested comfortably on it and stayed in the basket next to me during the thunderstorm we were having.  

So, that's life in North Carolina.  Critters, snakes, storms and who knows what else.  

But we are well and have once again, dodged Mother Nature.  I will continue to eat butter and not margarine!

Again, sorry for the dots. 

The same plant that went down in 2019

The same tree that went down last  year